Do you have your grumpy trousers on?

I’m only asking, because I have. Or rather I did. Only for a day but believe me, feeling grumpy or moody even for just a day (or two) is not nice.

I knew there was a problem when everything seemed to be getting on my nerves. You’d think that being offered a cup of tea is a nice thing, wouldn’t you? Not for me. In my miserable, grumpy mind, there was only one very obvious answer to that question, so why bother me by asking?

I felt irritable

But not for any tangible, logical reason. And whilst not being annoyed about anything specifically, I was annoyed by everything! After just over 24 hours of my miserable onslaught, I caught myself saying out loud “I need to go back to bed & start over again“.

So that’s when I decided to do something. Because when you are in a serious grump who  gets the short end of the stick? Your family, your friends and the biscuit tin. Family & friends deserve better & the biscuit tin definitely deserves to be shared.

A bad mood lead to bad sleep

In fact when we are feeling down, stressed, over worked, under appreciated or a whole host of other negative emotions, good sleep goes out of the window.

The impact of a poor sleep is far reaching. Because you don’t just feel tired. You don’t feel like yourself. You don’t feel anything like yourself. You’re on edge. As such you are more emotional, less resilient, more likely to loose your temper, or as I did, feel down right grumpy. So guess what? You’re too miserable to sleep well. So the whole mess keeps happening and those wretched days just keeping rolling!!

You become even less inclined to do anything positive, start turning to the biscuit tin and find it harder & harder to be nice to the people around you.

So what did I do?

I put my positive pants on

I went to bed. I went to bed at a sensible time. I switched off all that pesky social media, mobile devices & the tv – a couple of hours before sleep.

I did the whole bath, book, bed thing to myself. (The same bath, book, bed thing that you to do with your kids).

But I didn’t sleep well!

My new baby saw to that. The following day, grumpy & bleary eyed, but still resolute on making change, the only thing left was effort. A firm, conscious decision to put in 100% effort whether I felt like it or not. And at 06.30 on a Sunday morning I definitely didn’t. Cup of tea not yet in hand I put up my best foot forward and;

1. Stopped – to listen and engage with the 3 little people around me
2. Held my Tongue – when at 06.31 on a Sunday morning my 8 year old was babbling about Lego cards, Pokemon cards, and a host of unpronounceable characters and at 06.32 my 6yo pulled my arm out of socket in her bid to show me that EVERY SINGLE toy in the house was now gleefully strewn across the living room floor…
3. Breathed – enabling myself to gather the power of my natural happy hormones & new found positive pants before evenn trying to speak
4. Forced a smile & Focused on the positives – because even hypnotherapists need to remind themselves once in a while. Reframing your life is the ultimate key to happiness. So it’s funny that our lounge looks like a Toys R Us penny sale. It’s good the kids are playing the old fashioned way without TV or gaming. And it’s great they are doing the mentally healthy stuff because (without me telling them to!). Because they’re kids & they’re happy.

Did happiness come naturally?

Still sleep deprived, still grumpy, what do you think? But for one whole day I would make the effort, whether I felt like it or not. Because if I didn’t, anxiety & misery would continue. And where does that get you? Deeper & deeper into anxiety & stress. Grumpy trousers lead to grumpy shirt, grumpy hat, grumpy pants and grumpy boots… NO THANK YOU.

I’m not saying its easy, it’s not. But try it. Because as the day progresses it gets easier. At first you feel like a fraud. After all, they can tell you’re faking it, can’t they? Well no, as I found out they can’t, or if they can, they’re just so grateful for the change they don’t comment. And with this small (initially challenging) effort comes:

1. Positive Activity – Start to do things that require some effort. You may not want to at first, but you’ll soon find a degree of enjoyment. And that’s happiness you would have missed if you were trying to keep your grumpies on!
2. Positive interaction – put in the effort to be nice and guess what? People start being nicer to you & losing their grumpies too. Even your little people get a bit nicer!
3. Positive thinking – this is the hardest one. But with your grumpies loosening, this will naturally start to invade your brain space. Even if you don’t want to admit it at first, you ARE starting to think more positively.

And now you’ve had a better day. Not a brilliant day (let’s not get ahead of ourselves!). After all, you’re tired from putting in 100% all day. But tired & feeling more positive – you have a better sleep. Your brain resets itself and the next day it really does feel like you’re back!

Positive pants, positive boots, positive mum.

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